Drewcifer
Gender: Male
Location: Forest Park
Relationship: Single
Orientation: Straight
Children: Maybe Someday
Body Type: Average
Height: 5'9"
Religion: Christian - other
Ethnicity: White / Caucasian
Yahoo: drewcifer_the_death_hippy
Gmail: andrew.wonders
About Me: *I practice ethical non-monogamy (polyamory), or at least try to. That said, I am not currently looking to date anybody new right now. New friends, however, are always welcome :)*
Somebody once asked me, "What moves the soul of Andrew Wonders?" so in lieu of a forced, on-the-spot answer for profile questions, I give you an abridged version of my answer...
What moves the soul of Andrew Wonders? This is a massive question. You’ll have to bear through the rambling length here.
I’d have to start with music. I love music, almost all music. When I was much younger I would be late to school because I would stay to listen to “one more” song on the radio. I have gone through more tape and cd players than I can remember, and to this day, I can generally be found with my headphones on at any given time. I don’t know if I can describe how music makes me feel, especially since different music makes me feel different things, but listening to a piece of music that I like is like having a crush. When you actually hear it, you feel that fluttering in your chest, and the notes and harmonies become like caresses. When not actually listening to music, it constantly floats through my mind, either in the form of recalling a song, or passage, or composing new melodies and ideas of my own.
I listen to hip-hop (from the accursed “gangsta” rap to “conscious” artists like Dead Prez, Talib Kweli, and Pharaoh Monch), reggae(and yes, more than just Bob Marley lol), classical (from Baroque to modern, but I must say that I can’t really dig the avant-garde “atonal harmony” composers), and I love world music (African and Middle Eastern in particular… I have a long standing love affair with South African mbaqanga music, the style that Paul Simon incorporated on his “Graceland” album). Metal has been a huge part of my musical life, considering that I’ve been writing and playing it for the better part of 10 years, and a fan since before even that. I could write a page or two just on how I feel about metal, its place in the musical world, and how it’s so much more evolved a form of music than its given credit for, but I’ll digress and just say for now that I love it almost as much as I have since I first discovered it.
I love, Love, LOVE classical/symphonic music. When so many instruments and parts come together into one piece, it’s magical… it’s almost better than sex.
I’ve played guitar for 10 years now. When my cousin and I were both about 16, he began playing guitar and promptly started a death metal band. I thought, of course, that this was about the coolest thing ever, so immediately I wanted to play too. However, I didn’t end up following through for another 2 years, when I bought my first guitar, and began to really care about learning to play. I played metal for the bulk of those ensuing years, but my listening habits remained incredibly eclectic (despite several attempts to be more “metal” than I really was/am. A few years ago, while fooling around with a cheap synth program of mine, I discovered that I could produce symphonic-ish pieces reasonably easily. Since then I have been working on a a lot of ideas, and although my stuff has progressed from "Yanni on quaaludes", I still struggle with *finishing* a piece(you can check out my symphonic pieces by searching the email adress of: drewcifer_the_death_hippy@yahoo.com on myspace)
Spirituality and Theology come up almost neck-and-neck with music in my list of passions. I have been fascinated with religion and faith since a young age, and my mother becoming a Unitarian minister certainly didn’t discourage me. Although for several years I was definitely anti-organized religion (a.k.a. Christianity), this has lessened quite a bit in the past few years. I finally differentiated the message from the church, so I would even go as far as to say that I agree with the Christian message as it was put forth by Jesus, but I still have many problems with the church, especially the American/Protestant church. I’ve tried on many beliefs/paths, from Old Norse pagan to Rastafari and almost every fringe belief in between. As to how I ended up a Unitarian… my mother started attending the U.U. church in San Jose, CA when I was about 12. I took almost no interest in the church itself till much later, and only recently started attending again, but it’s one of the most affirming and open spiritual communities I’ve found, and it feels good to be around that right now. My spirituality is constantly shifting and evolving, so who knows where I’ll end up… but I’m pretty sure it’ll be an interesting trip ;)
Hmmm… I’m always re-defining my concept of God, because God is always showing up differently lol. I know that I don’t believe in a singular form or entity, from the old man on the cloud to an incorporeal spirit, but beyond that, it gets harder to nail down. I think ultimately that God is the almost imperceptible oneness that runs through everyone and everything. When you’re not paying attention, you don’t even notice it. I think it is our very nature to focus on our differences, for what else makes us interesting to each other? But, that we are all divinely created and carry a strand of that divinity within ourselves is something I think people don’t look at. It removes the comfortable barriers we put up, and forces us to be accountable for our actions and attitudes towards the world. I don’t think there’s a person alive, who hasn’t had at least one experience where all those artificially created boundaries fall away, and you feel the presence of that living thing, that divinity that you both share, and it is at this moment, I believe, that we are closest to understanding the nature of God. I have a story that I tell some people about my own moment of revelation. It was about 2 years ago, and I was in a rather bad patch in life. I had moved in with an acquaintance and his g/f, only to have the situation get very abusive, very quickly. I was sitting on the bus one day, listening to some spoken word and poetry. One of the poems was about the poets connection with God, that when no else would listen, or help, God would. I began thinking about the fact that previous to this situation, I had a strong relationship with my concept of God, that I could feel that presence. But at that moment I was lamenting that I no longer felt this, was no longer sure that I wasn’t alone in this world. Getting off the bus, I was wrapped up in this internal existential crisis, and didn’t even see the homeless woman approaching me. When she did finally get my attention (again, wearing headphones), I hadn’t heard what she had said, so I asked her to repeat herself, thinking that she had asked for money, or a cigarette. She looked at me with the most compassionate eyes I’ve ever seen, opened her arms wide, and asked me: “Would you like a hug?” I stood and stared for a moment, not knowing exactly how to take this. However, the pain I was in at that moment was tremendous, and I looked at her, almost crying, and nodded. She very gently hugged me, not letting go for a moment or two, and when she stepped back, she looked me in the eyes again and said: “you have a wonderful life.” Then she smiled at me, and began pushing her cart down the road again. I have never forgotten this experience. There was no doubt over the presence of God in my life from that point on. (Side note: I don’t know how many times I just used the word God in the last two paragraphs, but it’s a lot! I don’t actually talk faith this much on a day-to-day basis, but I had to include it in this piece… just don’t want you thinking I’m a big God freak… ok, maybe a little… but not in the conventional way lol)
Politics… I find politics fascinating and loathsome at the same time. Kind of the traffic accident response. Things are so bad that I feel like I need to know why. I tend to pour together the results of my theological studies with political and social observations, trying (rather futilely, most likely) to find an answer for just what the hell went wrong, where and when (and the more vexing question of “how do we fix it??”).
I have a lot of quarrels with the government of this country, both of the “leaders” in power currently, and the governmental structure itself. I look at Europe’s “welfare states” (most of Scandinavia, The Netherlands, etc.) as great models of social management. It’s argued that they can do this as very wealthy country, but is not the U.S. the wealthiest nation in the world? We can spend half a trillion dollars to bomb a country back to the dark ages and then grudgingly clean it up when it’s proven that our leaders flat out lied about all the reasons they did it in the first place, but we can’t feed all the people in our country?? I despise the two party system, but I realize that no third party candidate stands a chance in today’s political climate. Nader only got 4% of the vote, and he had an impressive following for a TPC. So I’m at a loss for what to do! *Sorry, I have a tendency to get a bit excited when I talk politics :P *
I have done quite a bit of research into social justice (though more often it’s social injustice), specifically into Middle East politics (again, theology is directly involved). It’s been a personal project of mine to research the Israeli-Palestinian situation. I just can’t shake from my soul that what is happening there is very, very wrong. However, I’m still most torn about what I can or am willing to do to help. I try to live a moral life (a.k.a. human decency), and act with compassion always, but I do not have a martyr complex… I feel like I could probably do more being alive. So, I try to act with decency around me, and in my day-to-day life. I trust that when I can do something, I’ll know it. At heart I’m an Interactionist. I believe that the way we act towards each other as individuals can effect serious social change, good or bad. So by this I mean that the way I treat everyone, from the business man to the bum on the corner, is an opportunity change a person’s approach to personal interaction, and if I do this with a positive approach, I may be able to spread that positivity. Or this is what my little idealist heart hopes for anyway.
I tend to be a very sensual person. Sex is great, with the right person, right time, and all that, but I’m much more for cuddling, kissing, and just generally fooling around. I feel that if you’ve taken the time to get to know their personality, you should spend equal time and attention on the body. In my ideal world, I like several people in my life that I’m sensual with, but only a few that I’m sexual with.
- Ok... thats the *ahem* shortened version... if you're still reading, congrats, and if you're not... oh well... maybe in another life :P
Music: Metal (In Flames, At The Gates, Rotting Christ, Black Stone Ritual, Iron Maiden, COC, Pantera, Carcass, Nightwish, Lacuna Coil, Gorgoroth, Dimmu Borgir, Kataklysm, Therion, Skyclad, Leaves Eyes, Borknagar, Naglfar, Dissection, etc), Hip-Hop (Immortal Technique, Aesop Rock, Talib Kweli, Zion-I, Akir, Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre, N.W.A., Ice Cube, Sir Mix-A-Lot, etc.), Singer-Songwriters (Simon & Garfunkel, Paul Simon, Jason Mraz, Tristan Prettyman, Ani DiFranco, Indigo Girls, Sophie B. Hawkins, etc.), "Hippie Music" a.k.a. Jam Bands (Grateful Dead, String Cheese Incident, Rat Dog, Phil Lesh & Friends, etc.), various pop music from the 80's and 90's (I especially have a weak spot for one-hit wonders), Mbaqanga (South african stuff; Johnny Clegg with both Juluka and Savuka, Miriam Makeba, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, The Mahotellas, etc.), Classical/Baroque (Bach, Vivaldi, Couperin, Scarlatti, Rimsky-Korsakov, Tchaikovsky, Copland, Warlock, etc.)
Movies: I have shifting and contradictory tastes in movies... I like poignant, independent films that make you think, but can also turn around and thoroughly enjoy total pulp. All time favorites include: Harold and Maude, Dune(the REAL one, David Lynch directed, 80's release, not that sci-fi channel hack job), Manhattan, Secretary, Singles, High Fidelity, The Big Lebowski, and Human Traffic.
TV: It sucks me in now and then, but I try to resist... kinda... shows that catch my eye: Bones, House, Grey's Anatomy, Weeds, Heroes, Big Love, and Tell Me You Love Me
Books: Authors:Armistead Maupin, Tom Robbins, Elaine Pagels, Gregory Maguire, Frank Herbert, Matthew Fox, James Morrow, and many more. Books: The Dune series, Tales Of The City series, The Gnostic Gospels, The Time-Traveler's Wife, The Ethical Slut, Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates, Shopgirl, A Spirituality Named Compassion, Only Begotten Daughter, and many, MANY more.
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Dear Drewcifer, I love your Goethe quote and all your wonderful words here, thank you for sharing your thoughts and life, it's made for fascinating reading and a joyful insight for which I am most grateful. Your story about the special hug from that dear lady has truly touched my heart and will stay with me as a miraculous image for ever. We really appreciate you joining us on EF and hope you find more like minded folk as our community grows - I'm just so sorry it has taken me so long to say hello. I'd like to hear more about the festivals you attend, they sound brilliant. I also greatly look forward to hearing more musings from you and maybe some of your music too?! (Our home is always full of rhythms as our youngest lad is a musician and composes for his band - we feel extremely blessed with lots of notes meandering through the cottage played on various different instruments...)
BeWith warm Smiles and thank yous for what moves your special soul,
06:36 AM CST