After writing this i realize i went off topic a lot. It's a lengthy blog about tarot cards, Aliens, opinions and other crazy thoughts which i carry around.

As of yet, few know i'm working on a tarot deck. Few know because i am not much of a salesman. That has always been a struggle to me. To encourage someone to take an interest in something. I think nearer completion i may start to promote it more. However...rest easy all of those who do tarot or appreciate the symbolism. I am not really the mind behind it all, i only do the artworks. Chanel has been reading cards for 15 years or more. So i can't just draw anything i want to draw like i was used to doing in my own artworks. But it is a good challenge that way. Trying to add certain meanings and emotions without using certain strategies where i might have used before to convey things. Sometimes when i draw, the pencil may accidentally go a certain direction not meant. Usually this needs erased, but sometimes it can create a more powerful posture in a character or a better emotive quality for the card than originally envisioned

 I like it when that happens. all hand drawings i do are from my mind. A very odd time i will use reference for things such as a frog or a horse because i am not used to drawing certain things. But i mostly let my mind do the work. There is a reason for that. I do that because one...i am lazy haha. but no, the main reason is. the drawing comes out of your hand movements as very natural, and you can exaggerate certain things in an artwork to emphasise certain things you want to stand out. If drawing from life, i'm sure it also would look good, but you might start to become worried about drawing/adding/extending dresses and gowns, things that aren't already on your reference photo.

I didn't know about tarot and i suppose i still don't, but there are a few cards that when i've drawn them, i began to "get in" to the card...the mental thinking of a lot of the cards. To me, it had to seem real. It is the story of a fool and his trials.

I relate to the hermit card of course because i am an artist, a poet and i live out in the countryside. Each of these things combined leads to a life of inward searching and solitude. I probably make it sound far too romantic, but really, it is a hard life to live. In cities, although there is a loss nowadays of human intereaction( ask someone something at a bus stop and turns out they have earphones secretly hidden away in their ears). the city is a living breathing place of people where artificial suns hang on steel trunks and keep you awake all night. So in the country, all you can hear is the cries of foxes from over the fields, sometimes some birds in the trees unsettled. but night is true night and you can see the stars and the strangeness of the mystery of the universe. I used to watch the air traffic and really, there is more than you think. are they all human? who knows.

So for the Hermit card, like all cards, i had a laylout of roughly how Chanel thought it should look. I am drawing her visions...in my own style, although she'll ask my opinions. She'll tell me the meaning of each card, and then i can suggest things. So some of my ideas are in there which is nice. For the hermit card we imagined what she calls "fathertime". For this card the hermit HAD to be living in clutter. I make no illusions, i believe clutter is part and parcel of having an introverted life. you spend too much time inside to see the outside. I don't apologise for it anymore, and neither should you if you are like this. Not all minds and souls are the same....some people never go inside their mind or imagination and we never think bad of them for it. Those people are sometimes referred to as...i dunno "realists". I am a man with my head in the clouds haha. though i much prefer it there anyway. For me personally it adds colour to my life. For most people for example, a forest is just a forest. But for me it's more than that. Each place has a history, and even if you don't know about that history, your mind still wonders about it. In any given place, there are ancient things unfound. you know this to be true. We've shared each and every part of each and every land with many thousands of years of human and dinosaur activity. But my problem is, i think i am focused on past mysteries. the future does interest me though. I believe that Aliens will give us the knowledge of teleportation in the future. The fact that i actually believe this without having any reason or proof too, surprises me...and, maybe scares me, but not too much. it doesn't scare me too much that i would think of crazy things with no evidence. I've understood like you, many things in this earth and human activity that are true, and everyday "normal" people can't explain such as how can we watch a box in the corner of the room and see news from another land when in our old days, the news would have taken weeks even months to reach our king, who then weeks later you would have heard rumour in the towns. Now we are all privileged to hear news right inside our own home, no matter how profound or mundane.

Or having a man walk along the surface of the moon. or having vechicles drive upon the surface of mars. I believe of course that for me personally this is the signs of the time where more than a few ancient scriptures have been talking about, the part where they say " you will see signs in the sun, the moon and the stars" Now this being enchantedfolk, i won't break into much biblical talk. that is not what this blog is about.

But the strange things, the changes in our technologies in the last 200 years are amazing to most people. we take for granted the ability to lift a phone in the middle of the countryside and call someone half a world away. Folks...when you get right down to it, that is a changing of earth's natural ways. But we as humans changed it nontheless. we changed reality by creating communication devices that bring us closer together. This is great i think, for human interaction. It's great for that, but the negative is all the radio and tv waves that pass through us and every living thing struggling for it's existence. But as humans we did change and warp reality to suit ourselves, and all changes to nature will probably have good and bad results.

I am not sure what will happen in the year 2012 apart from hundreds of thousands of people gathering at the ancient aztec ruins in hopes of seeing strange sightings.Maybe nothing will happen. Maybe something will. If it does, i would guess that the airspace from Nevada to Peru will be saturated with UFOs, and not all of them saucer like to look at. it will probably be a very scary time for human beings on earth, and also cattle in the fields and many other animals. when helicopters fly low at night over the fields, the cattle go crazy. Some have even dropped dead from fear(none of my fathers however). So with the UFO's, it will scar many living things. I do believe that alien people have been visiting us since ancient ancient days. Who knows who REALLY discovered fire at the start. Did man discover it for himself?

I saw a documentary once where jungle tribes were taught about the planets by men in flying ships, long before humans learned how to fly. If that is true, then it's something to consider. I don't really know where this blog is going....i'm off the topic entirely. It was supposed to be about the tarot cards i'm doing. But really...i suppose it's a blog about how to keep propping your head up when it's heavy with weird thoughts all overlapping and not making much sense.

The 2012 thing. I bet when that year comes, people in the know, will say the end is near and expect that year to be a strange one. Maybe they will wish it to be strange so much that they will work deceit and like about things they saw, to hype others up so that they can then feed off that excited energy. In the new years eve of 1999, many christian people gathered around our local town hall expecting to see the return of Christ. Now this surprised me. If Christ in the scriptures says " the day and hour unknown", and it's written more than once, and " not only the son knows, only the father"....did these Christians proclaim to have some higher knowledge than Jesus? Even the reverend whom they followed out to the townhall should have known better. I didn't write the bible, and i am not a reverened. yet even i knew they were acting crazy. How did they overlook these scriptures? Why would they think it would be so easy? and thus it appeared to me that they had become the one thing they were against all along. A Cult. A hypocritical cult. Though being an oul heathen that i am, i had not been to church in quite a few years by then, but the entire building became to me, a middle finger gesture shown to God.

This is why i fear 2012 could be another get together of crazy people. But i don't know. i really don't know. I think i would trust in the Mayans for there was something quite spiritual back in the ancient days that we seem to have lost now. I mean, the spiritual feeling is pretty elusive these days. The last time i felt a spiritual moment was when an entire audience of 70'000 or more people applauded Drummer Rick Allen of Def Leppard for his dedication to drumming despite his amputation in 1984. i had tears in my eyes, i think many people did. it was a very profound feeling of human appreciation that spanned over 2-3 huge fields i would say. the drummer you could was very touched by the appreciation of all the people. But as humans, the need to connect, to group up and have an experience exists all over the world. There is a comfort found in the company of like minded people. i do foresee a day but it's because i'm an optomist. i foresee that we will have ONE common experience that we ALL will see, and it will be strong enough to erase bigotry and racism from our hearts. It will i believe erase hatred from all of us. However...that hatred might have to be placed onto another thing not of this world, in order that all of us humans live in peace. When whites no longer hate blacks, when blacks no longer hate whites, when people no longer hate homosexuals etc etc, we will see each other as having the same colour of blood, the same human skin and characteristics. But it may be because we are joined as human brothers and sisters to stop the onslaught of those other immigrants.......Alien life forms from space.

All humans, at least human men(i don't know why) have the need for war. We war for everything from land, to women, to entitlements and sadly enough...we war even for peace. in fact, warring to keep the peace is the main reason, and i would say the noble reason, providing we don't overstep the mark and extend the warring to unimportant things like......*coughs* oil. Had to throw that in there. yeah, i think blowing up buildings and bodies and unnamed faces for black oil from the ground is a sign of human stupidity, but then that's what happens when you need to secure the human made unnatural way of life. To fuel a horse you give it hay. to fuel a car, you have to destroy and blow up things in other countries. But anyway, war is something that humans felt the need to carry on. it has been going on since humans were first made probably. Now...you have to wonder, was man made in God's image phsyically, or mentally, or both? Or was that originally, before corruption, or was it all the one thing?

All we know is, human men seem to be ruled by pride, and the pride can be broken down into different catagories such as jealousy and lust. they are also ruled by fear, and their fear of the unknown is very strong. In war, where once you may have hated each other, if you and your once enemy fight against an even bigger enemy, that enemy who fought alongside you becomes an ally and gets your respect. That is because he fights alongside you, alleviating your fear of defeat at the hands of the bigger enemy. Often people will say "mankind" and they include women in that. So if mankind loves war, we are to just blame women too? I do not think that should be. Although in recent years, many women have become quite cold and distant and not very loving at all, traditionally women had the caring loving side. I daresay, women in higher positions actually tried to delay or stop war from happening. Also i would like to say, not all men like to war, but collectivly their raw brutality seems to be harnessed very efficiently through scaremongering by leaders. their wills are weakened by the prospect of their land and their livlihood being destroyed alongside their families being murdered. put fear into a man and trap him in a corner, and he will fight his way out. In a sense, the media and the corruption of it is playing different lands off against each other. Like corrupt soothsayers and spindoctors. Many lives ended by false information and specially tailored half truths.

anyway, i don't know how life would pan out after today for example. I am told that many seek answers through seers and tellers of fortune although sadly many only seek answers about riches and love. or forced love, even if it means breaking up famalies. forced riches, even if it means getting one over on someone else. the heart of people can't always be expected to be pure in this world, no matter how we want it. Some never want advice, unless it is advice that lets them reach their goals, though the goals are leading to destruction. But i draw these cards and their symbolisms and meanings. Initially it was at war with my Christian faith. After all, the tarot is considered occult. But it became a little more clear to me. The Jesus that i know, is not the same Jesus that the same people knew when they stood out there in 1999 waiting for something that even Jesus himself had no knowledge of. I still see their hatred of gay people, and of muslims in many many places. I still see their idolatry in riches. Though it is not my place to judge, i daresay if Jesus returned, these Christians probably wouldn't recognise him anyway. They'd be on the phone to the president to nuke him out of the sky.

Whatever the case, many times when i read about Native American beliefs such as from the Hopi tribe, much of what is said, is how i feel about life and spirit. I suppose it is similar to bible scripture in many ways.

www.angelfire.com/folk/4eartheden/Hopi.h...

 

Drawing the cards is interesting to do. If used correctly i wonder that maybe it can help people. What i do know is, and for a long long time i was skeptical, the readings Chanel have given me in the past are accurate and detailed. There was no possible way she could have known things unless she's hired private detectives and sent them over to spy on me in Ireland. So, it is a strange power behind the cards then i suspect, but i am hoping it is a "good" spiritual power. I prefer to think of the energy as a caring loving entity...maybe an angel who is looking out for particular people who seek answers. though the answers are often not what we humans wish them to be. Then it is up to us to ignore them if we want. I do not know. At this present time in my life, i have a feeling that i am to complete the deck. my art at least to my knowledge is being used for good, to help people be guided in their certain ways in life.

here are some cards, and sketches and colours

 

thanks for reading this spiralling, rambling of non-sensical things.

James

One of my songs put to some of my artworks

 

Thanks for listening :)

 

James

I find myself at the crossroads

I long once more for the sand to

Bury her feet on the beach on a perfect

Summer day

When the waves came washing in

The infinite sea transfixed her

She said "James, you can see forever

On and on when your eyes search the horizons"

A Spanish angel on the northern shores of Ireland

Her Raven hair danced upon the breeze

And now left as a ghost dance

Through the memories in my head

On that day I had fallen in love.

A flamenco dancer giving life back to my tired eyes

I knew the sun in it's setting

Would steal what little time we had left

For she had to leave early the next day

 

That day could not have been made any more perfect

It paralleled my dream. It paralleled much of

what I wanted to say through paint and words.

My silence rarely seemed awkward. In fact, the silence

Still said a lot about the perfection of two souls sharing a day

Without the need to be anything else but our natural selves.

Her eyes, her dark hair complimenting the beauty of the rolling waves

All of her movements were moving art to me.

She was a painting in need of a canvas in which to be immortalised.

Though I'd already painted her into memory.

We danced under that beautiful sun.

It takes a special kind of woman to appreciate who and why I am.

It was hard to see her leave this land.

Now I've found myself wandering these shores alone like a fool

Retracing where we'd been. And when I sit down in the sand

Where we sat looking out at the sea I can almost hear her voice

And her laughter. If holding the hand of heaven was to abruptly end

And it was replaced by hell in Just a day

I wonder would I have been better off never knowing

What it was like to ever hold her at all!

 

I would like to state that we were not boyfriend girlfriend (just in case i get in trouble haha). But it would have been nice. Anyway, i suppose i can appreciate just being in the presence of beauty....or somethin!

The all consuming darkness

blows a cold wind deep down

into my soul

a Summer night never truly darkens

at least not this far north

the blue faded mountains

have almost merged now

with the night sky

lights flicker and dance

at the foot of the hills

a summer wind is putting

it's arms around me

with the scent of pine in the air

but it's not enough to soothe me

not enough to stop the lonliness

i've been talking to the air

pretending she was there

but i'm sharing the night with Jim and Jack

what we could have had

it's never coming back

The sunset in summer goes to waste

or at least it seems as such

like artwork hidden from view

a perfect setting for love

but wandering alone

the expectations of her voice

or her presence to arrive

to give some comfort

are gone, drifting

like the loose sand gliding over the beach

in a gentle seawind hidden by darkness

She is gone, but her words, they still stay

By James Battersby 2009

For a full year now or even more, or actually it was shortly after i became 26 the February before last i've been plagued by horrible dreams. They all involve a grey darkness like looking at a room and it suddenly starts to blur and spin around like you were stirring soup...that kind of rotation. Sometimes in the dreams i would look at my skin fade away like ashes or grey dust and i would become part of the blurry whirlpool. I would see myself fading into my death. Other times i would see myself crawling over my paintings blindly in the dark. There is always a horrible evil presence as i've often felt myself being swung around the room as i slept( i probably wouldn't even be surprised if someone were to witness this at the same time i was sleeping ). I've had the feeling of being choked, tramped on etc.

As a child and being bullied at school a lot i'd dream frequently of being in fights. I would always lose. But as the years went on, ten or more years, in dreams i am strong enough to win the fights i dream about. But not this one. It seems like i am not fighting a person but a shadow instead. I would go as far as to say it may be a demon even. It is something unworldly(which may have lived rightfully on earth once, even as a human).

After coming back from the rock festival(download in donington park), on the first night back (last night), i dreamed the nightmare again, but this time it was even more powerful and terrible. Sometimes in the nightmare i can break free by sheer will of force in order to wake up. Sometimes it takes many tries. you shout for help, but when you semi-wake you realize that the scream was just a whisper.
 
I have a feeling that negative energy attached itself far stronger to me at the concert through various reasons. The crowd was 75'000 or more and far too many of them were drunk and wrecking things and burning tents/exploding gas cannisters on the last night. It was a very dangerous time and you could sense the Nihilism in the air all around now that the festival was over, and people were still high on drugs and drink (not i). The fire fighters were out and so were the paramedics and the police. over the hills you could see fires in the distance...which were tents set on fire. People danced around the fires and would throw exploding things into the fires.
 
In the sky i saw three fires, likes stars it seemed at first, burning bright. The three fires just sat motionless in the sky like torches all firey. I couldn't understand what they were. I then saw another flaming object moving slowly towards the other three. It moved like it was controlled to go that direction on purpose. If it was not for all the fires and explosions on the ground, i would have thought it looked like the UFO's you see on documentaries. So the firey object moved towards the other three and then stopped without moving anymore. All four objects then hovered in the sky. They were not helicopters or anything like that. These things were hovering and on fire. The only thing i can think it was, was tents that the wind blew away, although it must have blown them up into the sky until they soared above and out of reach of the wind. It was a strange sight.

 

But coming home, i dreamt the same evil dream, but this time it was far stronger. I saw the room turn to grey and blurry, it began to spin and my soul seemed to turn around with it, only this time when it was spinning, it suddenly decided to go clockwise( the spin is always anti clockwise until this night), so it changed direction. I then felt a dark presence behind me. I was then raped by the ghost, but i tried to deal with the raping in order to just get some sleep and make it through the night. I then felt teethmarks in my skin, like a set of teeth clamping down . I knew this was really bad.....really bad when you can feel this going on. I was in a dream however, or at least a semi awake dream and i knew that this would just not make sense to anyone if i told them. (but i have to try). There was nothing in the room that was living except me.

Either i'm being spiritually harrassed or i'm losing my sanity. would could this mean?

 

James