..... I guess?

I think I have made the biggest thing in my whole life (at least the part I do remember since I opned the eyes here) that was to admit to others and not just to meself (as I have done all the time) that I am nae doing well, that I have a depression (wohoo so funny to write about that huh...not) So now my closest friends outside this realm of the net knows who things are and why I have been and still is reacting in serten ways etc.

This I hope was good and will now lead to better things.. it all happened a few days ago when I guess I finally dropped over the edge into some sort of abyss and hit the bottom. I just couldn't hold that depression inside, It was scary of course.. I hope the path that now lay before me will lead to better things..

When I lay in the bed

watching the walls,

feeling them coming closer.

I wonder.. Where is that door

that shimmer with its glory

and happiness?

Where is that door..

I wish to step throught

and never return here?

When I lay in the bed

watching the walls,

feeling them coming closer.

I wonder.. Where is that music

that tunes, that sparkling around

me?

I close my eyes and push that

strange stinging feeling down.

Will not show, will not hurt others...